Leeza Gibbons
Caregiving Advocate
Self-Love is an essential part of success and survival. Especially for Caregivers. I’m always talking about how essential it is that family members take their oxygen first when caring for someone they love, but there is still a lot of martyr syndrome and most still insist on putting themselves last on the list (if at all). Carepartners are the most remarkable people on the planet; showing up like loving soldiers on the front lines of often serious or chronic situations. It can be meaningful, rewarding, even spiritual work, but it is also depleting. I’ve seen people empty out physically, emotionally and financially, and suddenly life can feel like a hamster wheel of giving with not much to replace and replenish all that energy that’s going out. I think it comes down to shifting the optics and realizing that loving ourselves is job #1. We often hear you can’t give away what you don’t have and that you can’t pour from an empty vessel, so how can we shift our relationship with ourselves to make sure we always have a solid foundation built on love? Try thinking of LOVE like this and see if it helps you to move forward.
L – Let Go Of The Past.
You did what you did at the time with the information you had based on who you were then. You’re changing now. You’re growing. Refuse to criticize yourself. It doesn’t change anything. Approve of yourself and of the changes you are making to move forward.
O – Observe The Boundaries That You Allow Others to Cross.
This can provide evidence that you don’t yet love yourself completely. Children that talk back. Men that abuse. Bosses that take advantage. Friends who run all over you. What ever makes you feel undervalued. Remember you can re-set the boundary and redefine the rules. It starts with treating yourself better.
V – Verify the Things Holding you Back
and release them from your Life. In other words…..Face Your Fears. Do the Hard Stuff. This is the only way to gain your own self-respect. Ask for the raise. Tell your family you want to go back to school. Call your friend and tell her you don’t like her gossiping. Raise your hand in the meeting and speak in front of a crowd. We all have things that scare the heck out of us – and then we impress ourselves by doing it!
E – Energize your self-love effort
by releasing endorphins and fueling your success with movement. Your body and brain conspires on your behalf for your highest purpose when we unlock their maximize potential to serve us. There’s no secret here. You will feel better about every aspect of yourself if you simply dedicate at least 30 minutes a day to revving up your engine by pumping up your heart.
